Gaian Tarot Artist's Journal

Ocean Devotion (or, What is it about Mermaids?)

 (This article was first published in SageWoman, Fall 2002)

When I was 18 my boyfriend died, and the place I went for solace was the sea.  

Every day after classes ended I drove to my favorite beach, a rocky marine preserve in a small cove that was not well-known and therefore never crowded. I would sit there for hours facing west, watching the waves flow in and recede, listening to the sounds of shells and rocks tumbling onto the shore. It was there I first learned the mysteries of life and death and renewal, in my body and in my soul:  there is no death, only change and transformation, the ebb and the flow. Love does not end with death, for he was dead and yet I still loved him.

That was thirty years ago and I am no longer a maiden seeking to discover why people die. I am approaching my crone years, and I have long since made my peace with Lady Death. Yet I still go to the sea for solace, for refreshment and for renewal.

At 18, I didn’t know much about the mythic resonances of the sea. I didn’t know that liminal places, where land meets water, are known as places where one can slip in through the cracks between the worlds. I didn’t know that, for eons, people have thought of the sea as the Great Mother, and that the West was often envisioned as the Otherworld, the place we return to when we die. I didn’t know that, in the myths of many cultures, a sea voyage often enacts the passing into that other world, the testing of the soul, and the passage beyond death. And yet these are the mythic themes that I experienced, sitting there by the sea watching the tide roll in and back out again.

In later years I came to know the many faces of the Goddess, and found myself fascinated by sea goddesses and mermaids, along with many of my sisters. 

Wordless Wednesday: Green Beach Glass

 

Card of the Week: Guardian of Water

How appropriate for the Guardian of Water to show up this week, when so much of our attention is focused on the Gulf of Mexico and the devastation there.  What can we do to help?  Sia Vogel is doing a great job of keeping us up with the latest news from the Gulf on her blog and on Twitter.  Blog reader (and Gaian Tarot aficionado) Deborah Sam wrote to tell me about an event happening this Friday called "Unity Wave for Gulf Restoration." I plan to take part.  How about you? 

The website says:

The oil spill in the Gulf is a disaster for the ecosystem and all its life forms. This is a call to action for people of every faith, creed, tribe, nation and origin to focus the power of group intention to restore this area. You can contribute by actively and consciously holding a focused intention. Together we create a powerful group synergy, the Unity Wave.

The Guardian of Water, to my mind, is an embodiment of Kwan Yin and Tara and Mary, all Mothers of Mercy, Goddesses of Compassion pouring out their waters upon a troubled world.  We need Her more than ever.

What does this card say to you, dear Reader, either globally or personally?

Looking for Beach Glass

Here's my first attempt at video-blogging.  I have a lot to learn!  But still, it was fun. Come along and walk by the water with me as I go in search of beach glass. 

Mermaids on Retreat: Photos & Doodle-Sketches

Last weekend, I traveled with my mermaid sisters to Orcas Island for our annual Imbolc/Brigids Day retreat. We are a circle of women who first gathered together during the Goddess classes I taught in the 90's. They went on to complete the priestess training program I created. I have long since stepped down as "leader" and am glad to be one of a circle of equals. I have many other dear friends locally and around the country — but there is something very special about sharing your soul with a group of women that you have known intimately in sacred space for nearly fifteen years.

We spent most of the weekend talking and listening, cooking and eating, walking and laughing. This year we chose topics for our rounds — Health, Finances, Work/Career, Relationships, Spiritual Path, What We Care About the Most. And at the end, we set goals for the coming year. We would go around the circle by topic and each woman had a chance to speak as briefly or as long as she liked about that issue in her life. Then the rest jumped in with feedback or questions. The process becomes a cauldron for self-discovery and reflection, and I believe we all emerge from the Retreat with new energy and new clarity about our lives.

Oh, are you wondering why we call ourselves Mermaids? I wrote about that here, a few years back.

I opened a new sketchbook and sat and doodle-sketched throughout the weekend. I'm sharing some of those doodle sketches here. Please, be kind! These are not even remotely polished like my professional work. They are done solely for my own pleasure. It's pretty fun though, how I've managed to capture the essence or attitude of the mermaid sisters through a few simple lines.

Blessed be.

Church of the Old Mermaids - finally in print

Longtime readers of this blog will remember how much I love Kim Antieau's novel Church of the Old Mermaids. I was honored to read it in its pre-publication form a couple of years ago, and promptly fell in love with these Old Mermaids who found themselves living in the New Desert when the Old Sea dried up. I've gushed about the novel here and here and here. I am so happy that it has finally been published! I've already downloaded it to my Kindle and am joyously rereading it. 

The characters of the Old Mermaids seem to be so much more than fiction to me — they feel like they are the embodiments of Deep Wisdom, and in some ways they have taken on a life of their own.

Are you new to the Old Mermaids? Just listen to a few of their voices: 

Get the starfish outta your eyes, sister. —Sister Sheila Na Giggles Mermaid 

She who laughs a lot laughs a lot. —Sister Laughs A Lot Mermaid 

Sing, dance, create. If you have to choose one, do all three at once. —Sister Bridget Mermaid 

Go with the flow — and watch out for waterfalls. —Sister Sophia Mermaid 

You ask me to tell you about love? Showing is so much better. —Sister Magdalene Mermaid 

Laugh or weep. We swim in your tears. —Grand Mother Yemaya Mermaid

You can visit Kim's blog and read the first chapter of the novel here. And swim swiftly — don't splash! — to order your own copy. Buy a few for your mermaid sisters, too.

Home

I’m home, yes I’ve come home, to the muted silver and taupe palette of the Northwest in winter, so different from the sky-blue, snow-white clarity of Maine.

I’m settling in, getting back into my old routines. I’m almost back on west coast time. This weekend I’ll be immersed in sister-time, as I host our annual Mermaid Retreat at my house here on the island.  After that, I’m looking forward to concentrating on the dual paths of getting ready to move and finishing up the Tarot art.  I feel a bit anxious about the fact that the Seven of Fire has been sitting half finished on my drawing board since late November.  Between the holidays, an abundance of paid work and my trip to Maine, I have not made much progress on art.   I’ve changed my deadline for finishing the deck so many times that I’ve decided not to have a deadline at all.  I still have hopes the deck will be complete by the time I go to the Readers Studio in April.   We’ll see!

Can it be true?  Is Spring truly on Her way?

Blessings of Candlemas / Imbolc / Brigid’s Day to you all!

Season of Solitude, Season of Community

The terrible Northwest storm pretty much passed us by.  It was devastating to the south of us.  But, as Sister Kim Mermaid says, it was pretty much an average NW storm for us.  I was grateful that we didn't lose power.  (I was sooo prepared for it!) 

While the storm was raging outside, I was alternately fighting off a cold/flu while decluttering and deep cleaning in preparation for our annual Santa Lucia Party this coming weekend. The first wave of mermaid sisters and brothers arrive tomorrow and the second wave on Friday.  They'll help us decorate and prep the food and we'll help each other learn our lines — those of us who will be Numinous Beings during the party.  We'll have around 50 or 60 guests here on Saturday night.  Last year the Giftbringer was a big surprise — it was Mother Star Stupendous Mermaid!  I'm not sure she'll make it this year.  It would be hard to top last year's appearance.  But whoever comes, she or he will indeed be wonderful.

This will be the 8th and last Lucia Party at Heron House.  My deepest appreciation goes to Helen Farias, who began these parties back in the 80's as a way to honor a female Giftbringer (Lucia). Helen taught me so much about creating spectacular, dramatic parties.  We are still carrying on some of the traditions she started.

The deepest gifts of this season, I think, are the twin companions of Solitude and Community.  Let's make room for silence and solitude during these frenzied days, as Mama Gaia would have us do.  And let's gather together to celebrate with our chosen tribe and families, and turn the Wheel once more.

(Photograph from our 2000 Lucia Party by Paul Bingman.)

Of Whales and Mermaids

My mermaid sister Nora was visiting the island for a few days last week.  Late on the afternoon of the 4th, we headed over to the mermaids' favorite beach on the west side of island.   We soaked up sun, silence, water, rocks and waves, giving thanks for this special place and for our friendship.   I thought to myself, "The only thing that would make this day more perfect is if we saw some whales."  I've lived on this island for seven years now and had visited for several before that.  I've often heard the stories of orca-sightings.  I even put them into my Canoe (Chariot) card.  But I'd never seen them here, even though they swim by every summer in pursuit of salmon.  After awhile Nora and I began a deep soul conversation, as mermaid sisters often do; and just as I heard myself say, "You've got to think outside the box . . . "  I gasped and pointed:  "Whales!  Whales!  Whales!"   

Old Mermaids in Maine

My first mermaid in Maine.

We are everywhere!